"Songwriting and song writing information, tips, guidance all for free. Last of the Summer Wine Country visited this week

'One Minute With Dec'

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The Archive - '2'

Written by Dec Cluskey with a little bit of help from his friends.

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This Email first mailed to all Members of 'The Serious Writers Guild' and subscribers to 'One Minute With Dec' on

20 April 05

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'One Minute With Dec'

"My Emails Are Written With Good Humour And Should Be Read With A Smile"

[-The views of any contributor to 'One Minute with Dec' are not necessarily the views of Dec Cluskey-]

"There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up ."

john andrew holmes

MENU:

'Last of the Summer Wine' Country

Date for the Diary?

I get this question a lot:

Good Tax News?

Support fellow 'One Minute' subscribers?

Success Stories

Charts

Chart Comment

Subscriber's Section

The Gags

'Last of the Summer Wine' Country

I spent last week touring. did a couple of concerts in that incredible part of the UK. Around Holmfirth, where 'Last of the Summer Wine' is filmed. that is a TV series which is so quaint. The equivalent of 'Easy Listening Music'. The show concentrates on the idyllic atmosphere and serenity of that part of Yorkshire. It has to be seen to be believed.

My brother switched on the Christmas lights in the town last Christmas [and switched them off! There is a first?]. The most famous 'set' in the town is the famous 'Nora Batty's cottage. My brother knows the owner so we had some delightful shots taken .... gorgeous location.

Idyllic!

Go visit the town

If you are UK based, or on holiday here, go see the town. The 'Picturedrome' where we played is a Victorian dream. The acoustics are brilliant...so dead! Fred, who owns the place and is devoting his career to restoring it to it's original splendour, simply covered all the 'hard' surfaces with red felt. gives it a warm look and deadens the sound in a very professional way. So guys, take a leaf from his book....deaden your recording space. Or better still go to www.makehits.co.uk/art019.htm for advice that will turn your home studio into a dream studio.

Next major band there are The Stranglers....it's a fave place, simply because of the atmosphere. And the Bridge Hotel, next door, serves the best Yorkshire Sunday roast in the UK. Well they have to! They have a reputation to uphold. Even I ate it...and I rarely eat meat...it was delicious.

Date for the Diary?

My charity organisation 'The Grand Order Of Water Rats' have a fun, celebrity packed night on Tuesday 14th June at The Royal Lancaster Hotel, Bayswater, London, UK. 'Jeremy Beadle's ShowBiz Quiz Party'. Is it a Quiz? Is it a Party? Answer: It's both. A Quiz in a party atmosphere, a multi media experience with Great Music, Great Food, Terrific Company. Altogether a dynamite networking night.

Jeremy Beadle

Tickets from our office:- Garry at 020 7278.3248....mention 'One Minute With Dec' for extra special treatment. Tickets are 75 UKP ... tables are for 10. Tremendous corporate packages are available...and all for a wonderful cause. The only completely Show Biz charity.

"The ability to accept responsibility is the measure of the man"

roy l smith

I get this question a lot:

Hi Dec, its K***** here, I must say I have now completed the 10 month programme and I would like to say WOW, all that I have learned has just been amazing from the first release I have been mentally storing everything in, now what am going to do is re-read all of them over and over again until its stuck in my head.

I just have TWO question which I know you most probably have already answered but I would like to know where can I look up to find showcases to show off my talents, am a pop/RnB singer so I need venues where I can find people and people can find me, also I think am at the stage now where I need financial help and promotion help so I want a music manager but where can I find managers that wont rip me off, (is Showcase music book the best one to try and look for a manger?)

K*****

I give this answer so much, I can recite it by heart! I wonder could I turn it into a song. Never feel that I am divulging the method for success given in 'How To Make A $Million From Your Music'. Members pay good money for that and I never let out the secrets and methodology which gives so much success to the Members of The Serious Writers Guild.

Hi K *****

I am so glad you got so much from the releases. And it is wise to re read and re read them.

<<<<<<<<where can I look up to find showcases to show off my talents, >>>>>>>>

Showcases are well advertised in The Stage [weekly show biz paper, order from your newsagent] Also in NME and other music mags.

I would say, though, that most Showcases are a rip off. There is rarely anyone there of any significance and mostly they will cost you money to perform. The Stage have their own but mostly the acts are mainstream and maybe not suited to R&B, Hip Hop or anything chart wise. Although you never know...you could storm them and create a heck of a buzz.

I would suggest that my method in the Releases is the best...and works!

Simply beg steal or borrow a small P.A. Just two Peavey speakers on poles, a mini disc player and amp plus radio mic. and mic. stand. Go to your local wine bar, where there is a little space to perform and find the time that the proper boss will be there [don't just talk to the bar man] Say to the boss: "Listen, I do a great R&B act, I have some speakers and stuff in my car outside. I can be set up in ten minutes...I'll do a twenty minute spot for you now...if you like it we can talk about every Thursday [or the night you know the place is not busy]. I guarantee within three weeks the buzz will be around and this place will be packed......hey - if you don't like my 20 minutes, I'll buy you a drink...in fact, I'll buy a drink for everyone at the bar!"

K *****, if you know your stuff, your material is good, you look good and you are rehearsed and polished...this works! It also proves that your material is 'sellable'.

At some point you have to prove that the public like your material...so why not like this? Within weeks the place should be busy, you can then sell white labels....then get a great looking keyboard player [not a musician....yuck!] A great performer. She/he can do back vocals and maybe add a tiny bit to the back track on keyboard. Then get another great performer [keyboard player?] More back-vocals and scope for great staging and choreography. Make absolutely sure they are great movers and that they LOVE performing. Then better sound, better lights....then maybe a percussion player [stunning looking?]. Make sure all the costumes are 'themed' and blended [look at Black Eyed Peas, Scissor Sisters]

The buzz will be around, the place will be packed, other club owners will want you for their places...then local agents will find out and offer you other venues....your reputation spreads to the whole county [or the whole of your district - if in a city] ..... the white labels are selling like crazy, then posters, photos, take Polaroid pics. with punters.....money is good......you are collecting Email database and addresses like crazy. The local newspapers want pic. and editorial plus any good stories from you. ["Almost a riot at Jazzy's Wine Bar" .... police were called to control the crowds when the 'house full' signs were put outside...etc.etc.]

But it all starts with asking that wine bar owner....and proving your 'worth'.

A manager would be a waste of space, because there is basically nothing to manage! An agent would be the same....nothing to sell!

You have to do it yourself at the start...that is what all the successful guys do. It also makes you 'money savvy'. You will like the feel of the 100% of the money. So when it comes to using an agent/manager you won't give away the percentage so easily...clever?

Showcase Book / Kemps Book

The Showcase book lists managers, but it is just the same as looking for a dentist in the Dentist's Year Book...you simply cannot know how good or honest they are. The Kemps book is more Industry Standard. When the time comes that you are packing venues, sold out signs, selling white labels like mad and taking packets of money in merchandise....database of 40,000....then is the time when you will be surrounded by agents, managers, trying to get a piece of the action....and of course, record and publishing companies.

It is impossible to keep this kind of success to yourself!

Regards

DEC [Cluskey]
dec@makehits.co.uk

"You must change in order to survive"

pearl bailey

Good Tax News?

I give incredible ways to Members for reducing tax ...thus putting much more money in your pocket....just listen to this:

"Hi Dec!

I just wanted to let you know that I just had my 'lowest tax' month. 0,72 Cent...good system!"

>>>>>>But I hope you had the highest income? [Dec]>>>>>>>>>

"YES!! :-)

Regards... Florian Arndt [Germany]"

Success Stories:

[I only print one of the hundreds I receive. Go to www.makehits.com/testimonials.htm for stories that will amaze you and fill you full of hope for YOUR future.]

"Well your course is starting to work... Some friends of mine organized the 2nd Argentinean Festival. I started talking with a girl who had a microphone and was covering the event for a cable program

She seemed to have seen me interesting enough to ask me some questions  on camera.

She asked me what did I think about the festival . Did I have any favorite? Yes, a song in English, because I write songs in English.

The girl said "you were brilliant, good we asked you to talk". The funny thing is that there were people more important than me there, and I don't know if the winners of the festival were asked to talk... But I had the looks, the clothes, the star aura and I talked to her like a pro who was looking for press...

That night I ended at the VIP sector drinking for free. There was ANOTHER crew from a music channel. I did the same with them.
greetings,   Emiliano Canal - Argentina"

Support Fellow 'One Minute ' Subscribers?

Dear Stone Cat Fans,

We have added a few more shows in the St Louis area....

Sharky's (collinsville) April 28th 9pm-1am
Stevie Ray's (st charles) May 14th 9pm-2am

Thank you for your continued support.

Stone Cat, Janine, Mark, Jeff & Chad www.stonecatband.com

=====================

Charts:

USA [my thanks to Charles in the USA for supplying this]

(1) Candy Shop, 50 Cent Featuring Olivia

(2) Hate It Or Love It, The Game Featuring 50 Cent

(3) Since U Been Gone, Kelly Clarkson

1) Tony Christie ft Peter Kay - '(Is this the way to) Amarillo '

2 ) Razorlight - 'Somewhere Else'

3) Ciara ft Missy Elliott - '1-2 STEP'

UK Download Chart [now the most important chart in the UK]

(1) (Is This The Way To) Amarillo: Tony Christie feat Peter Kay

(2) Will Smith Switch

(3) Snoop Dogg/Wilson/Timberlake Signs

"Truth exists; only falsehood has to be invented"

georges braque

Chart Comment:

The first week of the combined shop and download chart in the UK. Doesn't really look much different although I am reliably told that the sales are much higher. Good move by the record companies?

USA chart stays sedately the same. And the UK just swap around a little...Nice to see Will Smith there...he has promoted that single like mad!

Whilst the mass media has been full of speculation over the last week about exactly how the UK singles chart will change it will of course be impossible to tell what kind of impact the new methodology will have on overall chart trends for a good few weeks yet. What we can do however is spot the singles that have benefited greatly from the new rules, and trust me there are some spectacular ones.

"Aviation is proof that given the will, we have the capacity to achieve the impossible."
edward v. rickenbacker

Subscriber's Section:

A question I get a lot...literally how do I start? Shoe string gear? Or full Mac driven solid gold stuff?

Hi Dec,

I am getting a small home studio together.

I have just spent an entire afternoon at an audio salesman's house picking his brains. He has an Atari
520 ST for sale, with a Goldstar keyboard, Korg 05RW synth module, Cubase software and lots of manuals. Price 250 UKP.

I explained to him what I wanted to do. Which is to take a sample drum sound from one of the 'Time and Space' samples and replace each part of the sample onto separate tracks and then put a guide vocal line over.

I can also get arrangement help from my friend Julian, who creates TV soundtracks (Jonathan Creek) and other theme music . He is however, very busy.

The question is what equipment do I need to purchase?  I assume I need something that will save in midi format, and not wav, so a studio can work with it.

Stephen ( the audio salesman ) seems to think that I might be better off with a Yamaha 02R Workstation or a Carillon, as he couldn't see any way to do what I wanted to do unless I bought a Sampler or went down the PC home studio route.  Although from what I've read, a Mac is completely useless in keeping things together. So a Mac is a definite no-no.

I would obviously prefer using a specialised home studio PC, but I'm not frightened of trying something completely different. You know the funny thing about Stephen is that he is selling his equipment because he needs the money for his rent. Thanks for taking the time to read this email Dec.

Best wishes,  G*** M*****

Answer:

Hi G***.....

I've written loads about this subject ['Uncle Dec's Lil' Instruction Book - Vol II' is full of it] www.makehits.co.uk/qabook.htm .

Don't touch Atari 540...very old, very unreliable and not much memory.  There are many Atari 1040ST knocking around...make sure it has a 'dongle' the plug in that makes the software work in a stable way. The Korg 05RW is a great bit of kit and I use it a lot. The keyboard, you mention, sounds like a standard 'mother' keyboard, probably with no sounds on...that's OK. Try for a keyboard that will give pitch bend, modulation and aftertouch. That means two wheels for PB and Mod and the keys themselves should send the aftertouch message when pressed harder.

You misunderstand about Mac....Mac is Industry Standard as the hardware for Pro Tools, Logic and the more expensive studio computer sequencing and VST [Virtual Studio Technology] programmes. Extremely powerful and stable but EXPENSIVE by the time you get going with it.

It is PC that is the amateur all singing all dancing stuff....don't get sucked in.

I hate repeating all this as I've got it in so many books etc......even on the website...just check out the Q & A's at www.makehits.co.uk there is a mountain of information.

Don't get sucked into buying a 'workstation' type keyboard, they are not nearly as flexible and user friendly as an Atari with Cubase, Creator or such [as old as they are]. Amazingly it is impossible to buy a Triton keyboard without the on board workstation. I have one and I have never switched the work station section on.

For what you are attempting you really need: Hard Disc Recorder [any of the Roland VS series are mighty powerful...I just love the on-board effects, Mackie and Yamaha are also good], a mixing desk [any good desk will do, Soundcraft are probably the better ones...don't touch Behringer or Mackie]  Although the latest generation of Behringer, say UB2442FX-PRO, are quite stunning. An Atari running Cubase or Creator for the midi sequencing, as many sound modules as you like...the more the merrier for bigger sound. As many effects units as you like and compressors. Plus a pair of Yamaha NS10S monitors [extremely hard to get...like gold dust!] run by as big a stereo amp as you can afford [or a Quad 405 or 303]. Finally a keyboard as above.

I bought my first mother keyboard for 40 UKP....Norman Cook paid 60 UKP for his.

All this stuff is available at the best prices at the Sound on Sound web site [readers ads]. EBay is an exciting place to find gear and also sell when you upgrade [as you will].

That set up is dirt cheap and, although the Atari is ancient, in the right hands, and with the right knowledge [all in my books] massively powerful and capable of phenomenal results. The cream on the cake would be an Akai sampler or two with as many outs as possible [8 usually]

However, a G5 Mac running a Protools program with a Triton keyboard, a Yamaha Motif sound module plus a Kurtsweil PC2R module would definitely put you in with the big boys! Then add some good Hip Hop sample CD's and you have it made [grin!]

Regards [call me if you don't understand anything...as a Member you have my private phone number...to the phone on my studio desk]

DEC dec@makehits.co.uk

"There is only one way to succeed in anything, and that is to give it everything"

vince lombardi

Regards

Dec

You may use any part of this 'One Minute' in your own publications...we simply require you to add:

Start ============

'One Minute With Dec' is written each week by Dec Cluskey. Dec's advice?

Get in touch personally to discuss what you want to achieve in music dec@makehits.com

web: www.makehits.com or call +44 (0)1323.728005

Finish===========

============================================

The gags: [Every Country has got a Liverpool? Only in fun!]

The Ferrari Formula1 team fired their entire pit crew yesterday. The announcement followed Ferrari's decision
to take advantage of the UK Government's Youth Opportunity Scheme and employ some people from Liverpool.

The decision to hire them followed a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from the Liverpool area were
able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's existing crew
can only do it in 8 seconds with millions of euros worth of high tech equipment.

Prime Minister Tony Blair went on record as saying that this was a bold move by the Ferrari management which
demonstrated the international recognition of the UK under New Labour.

As most races are won and lost in the pits, Ferrari thought they had the advantage over every team. However,
Ferrari got more than they bargained for. At the first practice session, the Liverpool pit crew successfully changed
the tyres in less than 6 seconds, but within seconds they had re-sprayed, re-badged and sold the vehicle to the
McLaren team for 8 bottles of Stella, a kilo of speed and some photos of Coulthard's bird in the shower.

============================================

How to set up a Demo consultation with Dec?

The Professional service the Professionals use. Even available for voice and guitar!

Simply get in touch by Email - click this link: demo@makehits.co.uk and tell me that you want to send your material for a full critique and appraisal. We will then send you a unique PIN number to put on your letter or Jiffy Bag. This will ensure you get immediate attention. This is also for security reasons. We do not open unsolicited Jiffy Bags.

For full details click on this link: www.makehits.co.uk/demo.htm

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